Wedding Ring Blues: Chelsea Clinton's Big Day

Politico has the details on Chelsea Clinton's $2 million wedding. You may start making smirky comments about the "Party of the Common Man" riiiiiiiiiiiiiight nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnow:
The rehearsal dinner is reportedly taking place at the nearby Grasmere, a 525-acre estate boasting a Federal-period manor house with formal gardens, stucco guest cottages and a large stone barn complex. Another area manse rumored to be serving the family over the weekend will be Glenburn, where the Clintons aresaid to be staying over the weekend. Glenburn is the Rhinebeck home of Eric and Andrea Colombel. Andrea Colombel is the daughter of billionaire financier and longtime Clinton supporter George Soros.

Nice to see the Clintons are able to spend so much money after careers largely spent in "public service." Also nice to see a Soros connection. The Shadow Party lives!

Meanwhile, The Last Honest Newspaper has the juicy details about pre-wedding jitters:
CHELSEA CLINTON in full meltdown mode after severe panic attacks - that new hubby will be a cheater.

Panicky bride-to-be Chelsea Clinton is secretly undergoing emergency prenuptial counseling ordered by her mom Hillary, insiders say.

"Chelsea is a nervous wreck as her wedding approaches. She's terrified that she'll disgrace herself and her family," a Clinton
family friend told The ENQUIRER.

The 30-year-old former first daughter is set to wed Wall Street-er
Marc Mezvinsky in a $1 million dream wedding on July 31 at the Astor Courts, a 50-acre private estate in Rhinebeck, N.Y. But now she's having second thoughts.

"Chelsea never wanted a royal-style
wedding with hundreds of guests. Now, she's scared to death she's going to freak out," said the source.

Panicking, in full meltdown mode, Chelsea reached out to her mother Hillary on her top secret emergency number as she met foreign leaders in Europe.
Gee, what would make Chelsea so sensitive about the possibility her husband might cheat? Remember how people used to say Bill Clinton's cheating never hurt anybody? Yeah, if you don't count his daughter. Nice.

Oh, and I would say the odds of the future Mezvinsky-Clinton straying are sky high. Chelsea may not see them, but there are red flags waving wildly. Let's us count them:

1. Mezvinsky is an investment banker

2. Mezvinsky is an investment banker for Goldman Sachs

3. Mezvinsky spells his name "Marc" with a "c"

4. Mezvinsky looks like he spends his weekends wearing his Yankees baseball cap backwards.

5. His dad is a former big-shot Democrat congressman who was later convicted of fraud. In other words, dad is a charming rogue.

6. His mom is a glamorous news babe who later entered politics as a tax raising liberal Democrat. (What an unusual career arc!) Undoubtedly a major league MILF at Marc's high school.

7. Can you say "separated at birth?"

8. Chelsea's a nice kid (well, woman) but she's got the classic look of the Playa's Wife. Cute enough, but she's also got the combination of loyalty and insecurity that Levi Johnson-types find to serve as their anchor. She might kick him out of the house, but will always take him back.

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